A card from Fair Play by Eve Rodsky
Partner Coach
Every time you help your loved one with their work, you are engaging in the highly invisible work of partner coaching. When you edit an email before your husband sends it to his boss, help him plan an important outing with a client, or lie in bed at night thinking through how he could be considered for a promotion, you are doing the loving and often unrecognized work of “coaching” your partner. This card can be one-sided (that is, a wife helping a husband but not the other way around). The aspiration is to hand off the card more equitably so both partners can benefit from each other’s support and advice.
Holding this card means owning all three
Conception
You are in a partnership
Planning
- Consulting with spouse about what is needed to enrich career. Examples include the following:
- Writing/editing/reviewing resumes, emails, contracts, and other business-related correspondence
- Fostering relationships with spouse’s boss/co-workers
- Writing/editing/reviewing resumes, manuscripts, presentations, talking points, spreadsheets, speeches, and other work product.
Execution
- Following through on what your partner needs and spending the appropriate amount of time doing so with your full attention.
Suggested Minimum Standard of Care
Was your contribution timely, relevant, and a priority?
A starting point. You and your partner agree the real standard together, and the holder meets it without reminders.
Holding it well
- The holder owns all of it: noticing, planning and doing. No “just tell me what to do.”
- Agree the Minimum Standard of Care together, then let the holder meet it their way.
- Not working? Bring it to the weekly check-in and re-deal it. Don’t take it back mid-week.
Put this card on your table
Deal it, agree its standard, and see who holds what. Free.