A card from Fair Play by Eve Rodsky
Family Planning / Birth Control
Why is this a separate card instead of being a component of self-care or medical? Because the woman should not be the she-fault cardholder, meaning either of you can claim this card. If having a baby is not on you and your partner’s agenda, this cardholder will research contraception options, which may include buying condoms, the pill, an IUD, or scheduling a vasectomy. (Not sure if being too tired to have sex at all is considered a form of birth control? Ask around.)
On the other hand, if you are hoping to grow your family, this cardholder might schedule a preconception check-up, start tracking cycles, research fertility apps, or look into prenatal vitamins and lifestyle adjustments that support conception. They may also explore options for fertility support or talk through timelines and next steps with your partner.
Holding this card means owning all three
Conception
Planning for a baby or birth control is needed
Planning
- Researching options (vasectomy, pill/IUD, condoms, etc.)
- Research options (fertility apps, prenatal vitamins, lifestyle adjustments, etc.)
- Scheduling doctor appointment(s), if applicable
Execution
- Implementing plan
Suggested Minimum Standard of Care
Are you protected from getting pregnant? / Do you feel prepared to start trying to have a baby?
A starting point. You and your partner agree the real standard together, and the holder meets it without reminders.
Holding it well
- The holder owns all of it: noticing, planning and doing. No “just tell me what to do.”
- Agree the Minimum Standard of Care together, then let the holder meet it their way.
- Not working? Bring it to the weekly check-in and re-deal it. Don’t take it back mid-week.
Put this card on your table
Deal it, agree its standard, and see who holds what. Free.