A card from Fair Play by Eve Rodsky
Watching (Kids)
If you have a little one, then you know that having eyes on your child is endless at the baby/toddler stage. Older children need watching, too, like preventing your ten-year-old from spraying WD-40 all over the living room when he mistakes it for air freshener (true story), or walking by your teen’s bedroom door constantly to make sure it’s open while a “friend” is over. Good news: It’s amazing what can happen when you put down your phone and really watch your kids. Watching a one-year-old may feel uneventful, but this is when you witness your child’s first steps! Depending on what time of day you hold this card and the age of your child, you may also be responsible for taking the lead on a number of other cards, such as “diapering and potty training,” “bedtime routine,” “meals” “transportation (kids),” and “tidying up.” (If you build a fort in your living room while you’re on “watch,” then it’s only fair that you break it down and tidy up before re-dealing this card to your spouse or other caregivers.)
Holding this card means owning all three
Conception
The kids have school
Planning
$1c
Execution
- Executing the plan for watching with full attention
Suggested Minimum Standard of Care
When under your watch, is the child safe, appropriately fed, and are you reasonably present and spending time on activities consistent and intentionally aligned with your family standards?
A starting point. You and your partner agree the real standard together, and the holder meets it without reminders.
Holding it well
- It’s a Daily Grind: relentless and time-bound. Make sure each of you holds a fair share of these, ideally one from each suit.
- The holder owns all of it: noticing, planning and doing. No “just tell me what to do.”
- Agree the Minimum Standard of Care together, then let the holder meet it their way.
- Not working? Bring it to the weekly check-in and re-deal it. Don’t take it back mid-week.
Put this card on your table
Deal it, agree its standard, and see who holds what. Free.